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Are you a Democrat, a Republican, or a Southerner?

You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, a terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife, and charges at you.

You are carrying a Kimber 1911 cal. 45 ACP, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family.

What do you do?

Democrat's answer:

What is a Kimber 1911 cal. 45 ACP? Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children? Does the man look poor or oppressed? Is he really a terrorist? Am I guilty of profiling? Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack? Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand? What does the law say about this situation? Does the pistol have appropriate safety built into it? Should I call 9-1-1? Why is this street so deserted? Should raise taxes and have paint & weed day? Can we make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior?

Republican's answer:

BANG!

Southerner's answer:

BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! Click (Sounds of reloading) BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! Click.

Daughter, “Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?”

Son, “Can I shoot the next one?”

Wife, “You are not taking that to the taxidermist!”